I would like to inform you that I am currently writing my blog post from the kids’ section of Barnes & Nobel in Market Commons. Why? All the other comfortable seating was taken due to the thunder-storm outside. I guess everyone thought tonight would be a good Barnes & Nobel night. Needless to say, my 5’8” self does not fit into small, hard wood chairs like I used to.
Anyway, there are 2½ more weeks of project left and the students are starting to wind down from all the summer project hype. It’s been an exhausting summer but it’s been so cool to see God working.
There’s been a huge difference in the unity of project since the beginning and end of the summer.
Beginning of the summer:
I nervously exit my vehicle and unpack my things while overthinking every possible thing that could go wrong throughout the summer. What if Walmart is a total drag and I’m burnt out half-way through the summer? What if I’m not an adequate leader and nobody likes me or thinks I give good advice? What if I don’t connect well with my room? What if I have to have confrontational conversations with people that intimidate me? What if people confront me on huge sins in my life and I don’t handle it well?
End of the summer:
I am inadequate. I am weak. Walmart management is not anything I aspire to pursue in the future. I did have confrontational conversations and will continue to. I do feel tired and burnt out. I have no ability to lead on my own.
Here’s the truth:
Jesus. I know this is something that is said over and over again in Christianity, but He’s truly the answer. I am inadequate, but He is adequate. I am weak, but He is strong and has shown me His strength. It is Jesus who gives advice and speaks through people. We have no right taking credit for the wisdom that He’s given. I don’t need to compare myself to others because God sees me as Jesus, not an important leader. If Jesus is our true focus, then our hearts are on fire for the gospel. This fire is illuminated in the way we interact with others and is truly beautiful.